Recap #279: Social Distance Snarking: My Demon Lover (1987)

Written by bat Published 16 October 20208 October 2020 Discussion Leave a Comment

Title: My Demon Lover (1987)

Summary: A homeless street musician becomes a demon when sexually aroused. (THIS IS THE LITERAL SYNOPSIS! I guess it’s… succinct.) [Wing: Casts a whole new light on that “tail” from the cover.]

Tagline: Falling in love can be very scary…

Notes: It’s hard to find this film unless you want to pay for a digital rental. It was released on VHS and DVD but again, I don’t want to own this. You’ll understand why shortly.

Also, I did this entire recap on my own before realizing that it needed a lot of commentary from others, to spread the ~~suffering~~ joy around. Thus was born “Social Distance Snarking”.

Initial Thoughts

I wanted to recap a film that is technically horror but also comedy. A HorCom? That sounds bad. I’m honestly not a big fan of slasher flicks, full out gore porn horror, most modern day CGI-filled horror movies, rebooted horror movies, “found footage” or demons possessing dolls films, or anything that has Saw or Centipede in the title. [Dove: You want Tucker & Dale vs Evil or Zombieland, both are a bit gory, but the element of comedy actually works, so it’s funny, not cringey.] [bat: I enjoyed Zombieland, but I also love Shaun of the Dead. That’s actually the only zombie movie I like, let alone love.]

[Jude: I’m the same way with the Final Destination movies, bat. I feel like by the third movie it reached a point where the filmmakers were getting off on being cruel for the sake of cruelty.] [bat: I’ve never seen a single one of those films. But I understand exactly the point you’re making.]

[Wing: I would not have expected bat’s list of horror movies she doesn’t like to be quite so extensive! Also, speaking of the Final Destination movies, Dove has been trying to get me to watch them for years and as yet I’ve held out.]

Practical horror effects and makeup are more my speed. Jump scares in old horror movies still occasionally catch me off-guard and succeed in making me jump. I’m so digressing but this all ties into why I picked this film to recap.

It’s been some time since I innocently stumbled upon My Demon Lover on TV. I would hazard that it was probably airing as a “Saturday afternoon” film on a local channel, back when local stations aired movies on Friday/Saturday/Sunday nights and Saturday/Sunday afternoons. I would guess it was in the 90s. It has been so long my memories are hazy. I did not catch the entire film; I entered viewing at a point where I immediately thought, what the fuck am I watching?! but proceeded to finish the film because it was so outrageously bad that I couldn’t seem to turn it off.

Scott Valentine, the eponymous demon lover of the film, was known for being on a little TV sitcom called Family Ties. He played Nick Moore, the boyfriend of Mallory Keaton, who was sort of a hot 80s punk who was really into making found object sculptures. Or at least that’s all I remember about that character, I didn’t regularly watch Family Ties. He was cute in that 80s leather jacket-wearing, big hair, earring-sporting rebel way that was very much a product of the 1980s but I don’t remember him being particularly talented.

[Jude: Oh my God I never watched Family Ties but they mentioned him specifically in a Family Guy episode.] [bat: Is it sad that A) I knew exactly what you’re talking about and B) spent the time to track down the exact clip where that reference is made?]

Even though he did a lot of scripted television and quite a few movies over the span of his career, Valentine never really hit it big. I think My Demon Lover was supposed to be the film that made him known but it was a pretty much a box office bomb. It’s also a pretty terrible film, if I’m being honest.

Here, just watch the trailer:

See? You don’t know how to take this film. Is it supposed to be full on horror? Is it supposed to be comedy? Is it dramatic? Is it slapstick? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?? (Also: way to entirely spoil 99% of the film.)

So, without further adieu, let’s watch My Demon Lover! [JC: I’ve never commented on one of bat’s recaps before. So glad my first could be possibly the worst movie in creation? It doesn’t make the movie better, but I think it helps to know none of us who watched this had to suffer alone.] [Wing: Note from the future, Flatliners has been published before this recap, and it contains comments from JC.] [JC: Wow, Wing beat me to my own “Note From The Future”!]

[Jude: I’ve never commented on bat’s recaps, either. It’s been a while since I’ve commented on someone else’s recaps, but all I can say right now is this is disturbingly similar to a 30-minute OVA titled Call Me Tonight. It’s also about a guy who transforms into different monsters every time he gets aroused. A teenage girl who’s also the president of a call service, Telephone Communication Madonna, takes an interest in his plight and tries to help him control the transformations via exposure therapy. Which means making him transform in public by showing him pictures of boobs and shit. Surprisingly, despite the plot it is NOT tentacle porn. Since it came out in 1986 I have to wonder if this flick’s a rip-off. It has a great City Pop opening theme though.]

[Dove: I’m a dab hand at commenting on bat’s recaps. We’ve nearly finished the entire Gen 1 My Little Pony ‘n Friends cartoon. Much as I love bat, I have come to recognise that if we work together, it’s going to hurt.] [bat: HEY WAIT A MINUTE, The Three Musketeers didn’t hurt! We got both Oliver Platt AND Michael Wincott in one film!] [Wing: Another note from the future, The Lost Boys didn’t hurt either. You can tell it took me awhile to have time to watch the movie and add my comments.]

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Posted in Other movies

Recap #272: Flatliners (1990)

Written by bat Published 10 August 20209 August 2020 Discussion 1 Comment

Title: Flatliners (1990)

Tagline: Some lines shouldn’t be crossed.

Summary: Third-year medical students decide to play with life and death, “flatlining” themselves into death to explore the great beyond. But Death doesn’t like being fucked with and consequences abound.

Note: This film has a metric ton of medical terminology – which I do my best to unpack and explain – as well as dealing with several suicide(s) and/or attempts. It’s not exactly a happy film. It may be too heavy for some in the current 2020 year of the pandemic.

Initial Thoughts:

Well, here we are.

Look. Flatliners is one of my holiest of holies: a movie I almost vowed never to recap, because to recap means to pick it apart and show all its faults to the world. I know this movie is flawed as fuck. It is far from perfect. Great concept, not so amazing story execution. It is a time capsule film, staring a bunch of actors that were (unfairly?) lumped in with The Brat Pack, which meant critics could (unfairly) label it a Brat Pack movie and clobber it in reviews. “St Elmo’s Funeral” and “The Breakfast Club Dies” were actually jokes made by Sutherland in a press interview with Fangoria Magazine. Kinda sums it up, really. [Wing: I want to watch The Breakfast Club Dies, honestly.]

Yes, it does star Kevin Bacon (Earth’s mightiest hero?), Kiefer Sutherland (post-vampire, pre-Bauer), and Julia Roberts (oh well), along side one of the lesser Baldwin brothers, William [JC: Lesser? Not . . . really? Billy was a top-tier Baldwin in the 90s. Until he wasn’t. Stephen and Daniel, the true lesser Baldwins, never reached Billy and Alec’s tier.], and (Dove and I share custody of) Oliver Platt [JC: Gee, guys, save some Platt for the rest of us, huh? I’m all good as long as I can stake claim to him in Lake Placid.] [bat: Please, go ahead, I’ve only seen parts of that and I don’t remember it at all. Placid!Platt is all yours, JC!] [Dove: I feel I’ve seen that movie, but can’t remember it. He’s all yours.] [Wing: I love Lake Placid, but could not care less about Oliver Platt, so as long as I get the movie, I’ll bow out of this fight.] Out of all of those, at the time, none were true Brat Pack(ers). Bacon, maybe? To contextualize this for people not born during this particular historical period, the biggest thing to come out of this film was the engagement of Sutherland and Roberts. Literally.

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Posted in Movie Recaps

Recap #271: The Lost Boys (1987)

Written by Dove Published 31 July 202028 July 2020 Discussion 4 Comments

Title: The Lost Boys (1987)

Tagline: [bat: Shall we recite it in unison?] Sleep all day. Party all night. Never grow old. Never die. It’s fun to be a vampire.

[Dove: That is a long fucking tagline.]

Summary: A mother and her two teenage sons move to a seemingly nice and quiet small coastal California town yet soon find out that it’s overrun by bike gangs and vampires. A couple of teenage friends take it upon themselves to hunt down the vampires that they suspect of a few mysterious murders and restore peace and calm to their town. [Wing: That is a pretty bland summary. I guess I’ve never read it before. Also, if the bike gangs are as dangerous as the vampires, as implied with that juxtaposition, who is taking care of the bike gangs?

Also, two warnings: One, we’re all wordy and this is one of our favourite movies, so this is long. Two, if you’ve ever wanted to know more about the recappers, our histories, and our fannish experiences, you’re in luck, because the initial thoughts below the cut map us out.]

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Posted in Other movies

Recap #268: Chopping Mall (1986)

Written by bat Published 10 July 20208 July 2020 Discussion 1 Comment

Social Distance Snarking

Title: Chopping Mall (1986)

Summary: Sexy after-hours party held by employees in a goddamn mall is interrupted by murderous mall security robots. Hi-jinks ensue.

Tagline: Buy or Die (Well, that’s… succinct.) …Half off is just the beginning! (Oh! It continued on! How… odd. For a tagline.)

Notes: Something tells me this film has become something of a cult classic and will either be very good (bad) or very bad (bad). [JC: Considering whose production company this is, it is going to be campy schlock. Because that’s what he does. (I’m not name-dropping it yet, because bat came to the realization eventually, and I actually cheered when she did.)]

Initial Thoughts

Hi and welcome to “how bat is trying to spend time during social distancing amid a global pandemic” portion of 2020. Seriously, it’s not like I really left the house a lot when there wasn’t a virus plague going around but shit is starting to get to me. It sucks being a empath. I think I need a tinfoil hat because I feel worn out.

But anyway, you’re not here for that. You’re here to read another recap about a horror movie! Distraction, yay! I’ve been looking to find some really bad horror movies that I’ve never seen and so far I’ve found some doozies. Today’s selection is 1986’s Chopping Mall!

So, somehow – this may be a theme(?) – I found another “horror comedy” but this one also has the distinction of being “sci-fi” as well. Unlike My Demon Lover this film seems to know exactly what it is – sci-fi/horror – with a dash of poorly written comedy thrown in because 1986. Er, technically, 1985.

I’ve heard about this film through Twitter and I think it’s been making the rounds on those pay-for subscription horror movie channels – apparently for sure on Shudder right now – but I only like things I have to spend hours trying to track down through moderately nefarious means. This is the age of the internet, you know. Why make it easy for myself?

Just watch the trailer:

Okay, trailer lies. No one broke into the mall. And it gives way too much away. For fun, I’ve invited JC to join me with commentary. This is not just because she confessed to peeking at my post as I was writing it but because I think I mentioned this film quite a while ago and she replied to my tweet about it. Maybe I’m misremembering but anyway. It’s fun to bring a new ~~victim~~ friend along for a recap ride! [JC: I have no memory of a Twitter convo about this, but it’s completely possible. My memory is very unpredictably hit-or-miss when it comes to conversations. Anyway, I’ve been wanting to watch this movie for the last couple of years, ever since I listened to the How Did This Get Made podcast episode about it (which I was going to link, but it is unfortunately behind the paywall right now. Boo.). I never got around to it until bat gave me the incentive with the offer to comment on her recap of it. Which I had peeked at long enough to determine what she was working on next. I mean, it was labeled “[redacted recap]”! How could I resist seeing what it was!] [Wing: I’m pretty sure there was a Twitter convo, because the movie’s been sitting on my list of things to watch so I can comment and up until y’all talked about it, I hadn’t even heard of it. I can’t say I was missing out. Mostly.

Note from the future: Apparently I mixed up two different twitter conversations about movies to recap, so I have rudely inserted myself into this recap, but since I didn’t learn this until after all my comments, well, I’m here! Enjoy surprise!Wing.]

Geez. I guess it’s time to spend an arm and a leg. Let’s go Chopping!

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Posted in Snark at the Moon! recaps

Recap #207: Teen Wolf Too (1987)

Written by bat Published 20 January 201913 April 2019 Discussion Leave a Comment

Title: Teen Wolf Too (1987)

Summary: Todd Howard is a Hamilton University freshman with a full athletic scholarship: only Todd has no idea why, since he’s far more interested in veterinary medicine than sports. But his boxing coach, Bobby Finstock, is very familiar with the Howard family secret and he’s hoping he can use it to his advantage. When the whole school (including Todd) finds out that he’s a werewolf with superhuman abilities, Todd’s popularity skyrockets and he becomes the big wolf on campus. But is his fame a gift? Or a curse?

Tagline: A hair-raising comedy. (Which tells you nothing. NOTHING.)

Initial Thoughts

Happy SUPER WOLF BLOOD MOON! Holy crap, did I pick a perfect time to post this or what?? Honestly I had no idea ~~slacking off~~ delaying posting due to the holidays and other stresses would mean I would find myself posting a a recap about a werewolf film incidentally on the Wolf Moon (last time it was the Beaver Moon but that was fitting since Scott’s team were the Beavers) and it just happens to be a total lunar eclipse during a “super moon”, and the moon will be “blood red”. THIS CAN’T BE MORE PERFECT IF I EVEN TRIED! AND I DIDN’T TRY!

Wing and I are back again, Snarking at the Moon!, with recaps of our favorite werewolf films. You might remember I chose Teen Wolf (1985) as my first outing. Now we’ve come full circle (sorry, terrible moon puns ahoy) to my favorite sequel, Teen Wolf Too!

I’ve already noted that I had a five-second crush on Jason Bateman all because of this film. Where as Michael J. Fox’s Scott was a basketball player, Todd Howard — Scott’s cousin, how convenient, filmmakers — is good at boxing. Well, sort of. At least there will be almost zero basketball playing in this film, after I had to sit through so. much. basketball. during the first film. Never gonna get all that time back.

Boxing? BOXING! Which is a lot more fun, because people get to punch each other. Moves a lot faster then stupid sportsball games, that’s for sure.

Ignoring the fact that yet again we’re centering the movie around sports (yawn), this one has just as much (if not more) heart to the characters. Several of the original film’s characters return and grow in surprising ways; Todd, our new lead, is a lot different from Scott. Scott was concerned about high school-level priorities. Scott is a college man who wants to help animals. Both get trapped in the spotlight of popularity. Scott learned a lesson. Will Todd learn one, too? (You will have to find out by reading the recap.)

This, like many sequels, was not well received by critics or audiences upon its initial release. I’m not sure it even did well in video rentals, because if I am brutally honest, it’s not that good. But it’s cheesy, has a heart and a good message, and there’s werewolves. So let’s begin!

[Wing: I love sports movies, but I love boxing even more, so that plus werewolves has me excited. This is one of the movies I’ve never seen before, so it’s nice to check it off the list, too.]

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Posted in Other movies

Recap #189: Halloween Extravaganza 2018: Mr. Boogedy (1986)

Written by bat Published 22 October 20186 August 2019 Discussion Leave a Comment

Title: Mr. Boogedy (1986)

Summary: The Davis family, who have recently moved to Lucifer Falls, realize that not all is as it seems in their new home. In fact, they are haunted by none other than Mr Boogedy!

Notes: For those who remember this but can’t find a copy, it’s on YouTube or can be rented on Google Play.

Initial Thoughts:

Happy Halloween, everybody! For this year’s Halloween Extravaganza, I dug into one of the deep cuts, from clear back when I was a bitty bat.

If you were on the younger side during the mid-80s, you probably remember when the Walt Disney company used to put out made-for-TV-movies every Sunday night. A lot of them were cheaply produced “sequels” to bigger box office hits. (Splash, Too instantly comes to mind.)

But then there was Mr. Boogedy, which was actually a failed pilot for a television series, believe it or not. (I honestly don’t think that it was very strong inspiration for a television series, but that’s just my opinion.) That aside, Mr Boogedy was down right scary and fucked up when you were 4-6 years old and somehow your parents thought it was fine because it was a Disney special. I remember exactly where I was when I first saw it. My mother had gone to visit a woman who was involved in the bowling league, who had a daughter my age. Said daughter insisted we put on Mr Boogedy, while our mothers talked bowling.

It scared the shit out of me. Mostly because we left before I got halfway through it, therefore I was left with my impressive childlike imagination to fill in the blanks. I swear, it was far more thorough in scaring me to death then reality. But anyway.

The word “boogedy” actually comes from a Stephen King film, “Cat’s Eye”, according to director Scott Oz. Actually, I never knew where they got that but now I know and while cool, I feel a little let down for reasons I’m not sure of. I think because this film, and its not as impressive sequel, Bride of Boogedy, occupy a part of my memories that are probably trigger points for what scared me as a child, I wanted it to have a much creepier definition.

Boogedy isn’t even a real word, according to the dictionary, so I’m not sure what I wanted.

Also, it’s fun to see the back lot of Disney Studios, which has subsequently been torn down. The film was shot there in roughly two weeks. Disney under estimated how popular it would turn out to be, but has consistently ignored calls for it to be released on home video and DVD for decades. [Wing: This amazes me, because it’s not Disney can’t easily release it and Disney does like any sort of potential money.]

I’m not going to get into the story here. I think it’s much more fun, especially if you’re new to the Boogedy series, to go in cold. So settle in with some pumpkin juice and popcorn. TIME TO GET BOOGEDY!

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Posted in Snark at the Moon! recaps

Recap #102: Teen Wolf (1985)

Written by bat Published 4 November 201713 April 2019 Discussion 1 Comment

Title: Teen Wolf (1985)

Summary: What’s a high school kid got to do to be popular? Just let down his hair and howl! Starring Michael J. Fox, Teen Wolf is an outrageous comedy about a shy teenager with more than a changing voice to contend with… he’s a budding young werewolf! And when his new-found powers help him score at basketball – and with the popular girls – he has some pretty hairy decisions to make.

Tagline: He always wanted to be special – but he never expected like this!

Note: I am watching the Bluray edition, which I don’t know why that matters but I’m still noting it. We’ll see how well the special effects hold up under the digital transfer. (Spoiler: they don’t.)

Initial Thoughts

Happy Beaver Moon, everyone! This is my half of the initial Snark At the Moon! recaps; Wing published a recap of The Howling on the Full Harvest Moon in October. There’s a reason she gave me the Beaver Moon… and not just because I reside in the Beaver State.

I am not unfamiliar to this film, or its sequel, Teen Wolf, Too. In fact, I am more partial to the cheesy story, bad acting, and over-all shameful antics of the sequel, probably because I had a crush on Jason Bateman for all of five minutes when I was 10. It was the movie character I had eyes for, really; I don’t think I ever watched the sitcom that made him famous back in the day. (Y’know, before Arrested Development revitalized his career.) Anyway.

Teen Wolf was released during the heady days of Michael J. Fox mania, which was already in full swing because of Family Ties and the release of Back to the Future in July of 1985. Again, I wasn’t exactly the target age group at the time, at least not in the sense of thinking him a teen heartthrob or some such. (I was 4 years old when this film hit theaters.) So I didn’t see it, properly, until several years out from its initial release. Nor was I really into werewolves. The sequel was more responsible for spurring that interest in weres, since I’m a vampire girl at heart. I think I also had trouble identifying with the story line that is steeped in popularity cliques, underage drinking/partying, and ‘fitting in’. Plus most of the film involves basketball, which is a sport and I have zero interest in those. (I only know what I know about boxing because, again, of the sequel. Being a super athlete with preternatural abilities is the driving story line in both films. At least Todd, Scott’s cousin, had brains to fall back on!)

Still, this film would trigger the sequel I’ve spent a lot of time talking about, a Saturday morning cartoon series, and a whole MTV scripted series “reboot” decades after its release (which was a whole other beast, honestly, but one I deeply loved, and I have FEELINGS now that it’s ended.) I’m sure it’s safe to say that Teen Wolf is embedded in collective pop culture memory for at least another couple decades.

[Wing: So, here’s the thing. I’d say it’s a secret, except I’ve mentioned it around here before: despite my well-known love of werewolves, I have never seen either of these movies or the cartoon series (and only season one and part of season two of the MTV reboot, which I mostly marathoned over a few days after my mom’s funeral, so don’t remember much about). How I missed this movie, when I love werewolves and horror and horror-comedy and Michael J. Fox? Who the fuck knows. But here I am, all these years later, finally remedying it. I’m so glad y’all are along for the ride.]

Okay, let’s just get to recapping, shall we.

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