Title: The Nightmare Room – Goblin Moon, a.k.a. “WHERE’S MY MOON CAKE BEDELIA?!”

Author: Wang Han

Summary: Congratulations go to Wang Han, a fifth-grader from California, who is our Grand Prize winner. R.L. Stine will be visiting Wang Han’s school later this year!

Rediscoverer: Goosebumps_Completionist

Initial Thoughts

Jeez for someone who loved this stuff as a kid (AND STILL DO) I can’t believe how much good shit I missed out on back in the day. Like I know I’m not the most observant person, but I’m amazed at how much of this wasn’t even on my radar. [Wing: Well, we didn’t have quite as much access to media back then. Collecting and tracking things was much more difficult. I don’t blame anyone for missing these things.]

Anyway, kudos to our dear Goosebumps_Completionist who found this story back in January 2024, archived on The Nightmare Room website. And kudos to Wang Han. Hope he got to enjoy his visit with R.L. Stine. Man, Stine sure visited a lot of schools. [Wing: Which is very cool. Though he never visited my school. That feud started young, I guess.]

Recap

Mark Taylor and Harry Osland were two kids at summer camp and they were BORED with a capital “B.” The only stuff they got to do is guided nature tours by their counselor, Mr. Nat. Oh look a leaf. Oh there’s another leaf. And another. Isn’t nature fascinating, Wing? [Wing: … I mean, I am the person whose current travel goal is to visit all the USA National Parks, so yes. Plus, I only went to summer camp twice, and both times was church camp (growing up in a church cult say what), but I can’t imagine being bored at summer camp.]

Deliberately walking slower than the rest of the group, Mark and Harry waited until everyone else was out of sight to do some real exploring. There’s gotta be SOMETHING fun to do in the woods, right?

Turns out Mark and Harry’s prayers were about to be answered when a green-skinned, yellow-eyed, purple-clad creature jumped out of the Redwood trees. Norman is that you?

[Wing: It was a one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater. (Speaking of summer camp things, “The Purple People Eater” is now stuck in my head.]

The Goblin of the trees told the boys he knows a REAL fun game they can play. And if they’re not interested in playing, he’ll just bake them into his moon cake right now!

Scared, the boys agreed to play the goblin’s game. The rules are simple:

• Make it to the Goblin’s house inside a tall tree before the moon is full [Wing: Needs more werewolves.]
• Avoid the big blue beast guarding the house [Wing: Blue werewolf?!]
• Find the diamond in the Goblin’s basement
• If the boys scream three times, they LOSE [Wing: Each of them have three screams or three screams total?]

A big, blue beast eh? I wonder what books Wang’s been reading.

Ah, the classics.

[Wing: I definitely read that as Wing at first and not Wang, so have my initial response, which was: Hey, show me a person who grew up in the 80s and 90s who didn’t have a crush on some sort of blue creature. X-Men, Gargoyles, hell, someone probably had a crush on a Smurf.]

Anyway, Mark and Harry started searching for the Goblin’s home. They heard his wicked laughter echoing throughout the forest when it was interrupted by a scream! Mark’s scream to be exact. Harry found his friend on the floor, having been smacked in the face by a low tree branch. There was blood dripping from his mouth. Pinned to his head was a parchment that said “GOTCHA!” Mark was even coughing the red stuff up. Yuckers.

Eventually the boys found a huge tree with twisted roots and a door built into it.

And… the BEAST!

Harry and Mark both screamed as a blue-furred monster chased them around the tree until they dove through the front door. All they found inside was an empty living room with a big, black pot in the center. Harry didn’t want to imagine what was inside. The boys ran for the basement, slamming the door shut to keep the beast from reaching them. Now they had to find the diamond. Was that it on the table? Oh no, it’s just a clump of shiny WORMS! Now Harry screamed, tying the boys with two strikes each.

Mark looked around when he saw a nearby window. Outside the moon was in the sky, and for a moment it turned into a laughing green face. Harry heard him scream and THEN… nothing.

He was alone.

Desperately he groped around in the dark until he found something on another table. The diamond!

And then a scaly hand grabbed Harry’s shoulder and asked if he was having fun.

Harry screamed.

Final Thoughts

Oh if only there was someone who could defeat the terrible goblin. Some sort of hero in perhaps in a red and blue costume who swings around on a, I want to say a line or a thread or something.

Oh well. Cake, Wing?

[Wing: Always cake. This was adorable, actually, and I love that both boys lost in the end. Kids are vicious in the stories they tell, and I love them for it.]