Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #277: Give Yourself Goosebumps Special Edition #7: Trick or… Trapped! by R.L. Stine

Trick or Trapped Cover Art
Trick or Trapped Cover Art

Title: Give Yourself Goosebumps Special Edition #7 – Trick or… Trapped!, a.k.a. “A Thing’s Pumpkin Soup”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Craig White

Summary: No Treats On This Street!

Sunshine Court is the best spot for trick-or-treating this Halloween, and it’s all yours! Your mouth starts watering just thinking about all that candy…

But you better save your spit. There are no treats here! Instead, the five little houses are full of horrible tricks! Now you have to collect the right items to find your way out! Choose your house and your weapons wisely – or you could do battle with angry elves, aliens shaped like your parents, or the freezing Arctic…

The choice is yours in this scary GOOSEBUMPS adventure that is packed with over 20 super-spooky endings!

Initial Thoughts

You know me, the fighting freak Jude

And we’re at Sunshine Court

You ready?

Congratulations to those who managed to make it to October this year with everything being thrown at us. While I started working on this special recap in July, I’m assuming by now there’s no way any of us (at least those of us in America) can have a regular Halloween due to the pandemic. [Wing: But we’re going to celebrate it up around here, like always! Especially with that Halloween full moon that is also a blue moon and, of course, October has two of my three favourite full moons, Harvest and Hunter’s. Werewolf recaps are coming your way, culminating with this year’s Snark at the Moon. Let’s kick this month off right!]

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #276: Goosebumps Series 2000 #13: Return to Horrorland by R.L. Stine

Return to HorrorLand Cover by Tim Jacobus
Return to HorrorLand Cover by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps Series 2000 #13 – Return to HorrorLand, a.k.a. “Let’s Play: The Happy Tooth Game”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: Long time no scream!

Summary: “There’s a food stand over there,” I said, pointing. A Horror in a purple apron leaned against a small cart.

We hurried over to it. A sign on top of the cart read: FINGERS

“Great! You got chicken fingers?” Luke asked the Horror.

She shook her head. “No. Just fingers.”

I lowered my eyes to the cart. Steam rose up. I saw a pile of fingers toasting inside. Human fingers.

“They’re pretty good with ketchup,” the Horror rasped.

Initial Thoughts

For the first time ever in Point Horror history, we’re bringing you a sponsored recap!

If you’ve been living in the U.S. or paying attention to social media you’ll know protests have broken out across the world after the Minneapolis police murdered George Floyd. [Wing: And many other people, including Breonna Taylor, who was shot in her goddamn home.] Multiple protests have begun in cities throughout the United States and the world because people have finally had enough of the pigs in blue.

I took a chance and set up a post offering fanfic commissions, recap slots on here, and liveblog slots to anyone who’s donated $25 or more to any of the protest funds, GoFundMe campaigns, or campaigns connected to Black Lives Matter.

Sailoreuterpe on tumblr sent a donation big enough to gain all three options. They originally requested I recap “One Day at HorrorLand,” but since I already covered that one last year I offered to recap its 2000 sequel.

Before we begin, as a quick reminder I’m still taking slots for recaps in exchange for donations to any organizations helping Black Lives Matter. Just DM me a timestamped receipt of $25 or more over on tumblr or twitter, or you can email me at hawaiipj1959@gmail.com. I will be doing this for as long as necessary to help with the protesting.

Keep in mind I need to be able to access the work in question to recap it, and I can’t recap something that was already covered on here by other recappers.

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #275: Even More Short & Shivery by Robert D. San Souchi – Part 3

Even More Short & Shivery Cover
Even More Short & Shivery Cover

Title: Even More Short & Shivery

Author/Editor/Reteller: Robert D. San Souci

Illustrator: Jacqueline Roberts

Tagline: Thirty Spine-Tingling Tales

Summary: Thirty spine-chilling stories from around the world provide plenty of shivers in this spooky collection. Curl up with old friends like Washington Irving’s “Guests from Gibbet Island” or Charles Dickens’s “Chips.” Or make the acquaintance of “The Skull That Spoke” and “The Monster of Baylock” – but beware of spectral visitors like “The Blood Drawing Ghost.” This exciting mixture of classic and contemporary tales from Mexico, China, Poland, Nigeria, and other lands near and far is perfect for hair-raising reading!

Initial Thoughts

We’ve reached the midway point of these recaps and we’ll largely be getting a break from the U.S. and Britain (except for one story). (Part One. Part Two.)

For this round of five chilling tales of international terror, we’ll be exploring a haunted house I think Wing may enjoy, an early variation of an infamous creepypasta, a bittersweet Hans Christian Anderson story, and we’ll also meet a witch who saves the day via the power of looking FINE.

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #274: Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight Annual #6 by Alan Grant and Barry Kitson

LOTDK Annual #6 Cover
LOTDK Annual #6 Cover

Title: Batman Legends of the Dark Knight Annual #6 – “Executioner”

Plot: Alan Grant and Barry Kitson

Script: Alan Grant

Art: Vince Giarrano

Colors: John Kalisz

Separations: Digital Chameleon

Letters: Willie Schubert

Assistant Editor: Chuck Kim

Editor: Archie Goodwin

Summary: N/A

Initial Thoughts

I would like to apologize because when I first chose to review this comic, I meant it in regard solely to the COVID-19 Pandemic and the government’s willingness to reopen even at the cost of peoples’ lives. With the death of George Floyd, all the protesting that has emerged in response to that and every other police brutality death, and the response of the police, this story became so much more relevant.

As a reminder I am still taking recap slots for donations of $25 or more to help with Black Lives Matter, the Yemen Crisis, the Philippines Crisis, and what’s going on with the indigenous nations in this country. You can find the information here along with a list of books that haven’t yet been recapped on Point Horror.

Time for another comic recap. I was on the fence about whether to post this here or on Nostalgic Bookshelf, but I figured Batman comics can go under horror by default.

Legends of the Dead Earth
Legends of the Dead Earth

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #273: Even More Short & Shivery by Robert D. San Souci – Part Two

Even More Short & Shivery Cover
Even More Short & Shivery Cover

Title: Even More Short & Shivery

Author/Editor/Reteller: Robert D. San Souci

Illustrator: Jacqueline Roberts

Tagline: Thirty Spine-Tingling Tales

Summary: Thirty spine-chilling stories from around the world provide plenty of shivers in this spooky collection. Curl up with old friends like Washington Irving’s “Guests from Gibbet Island” or Charles Dickens’s “Chips.” Or make the acquaintance of “The Skull That Spoke” and “The Monster of Baylock” – but beware of spectral visitors like “The Blood Drawing Ghost.” This exciting mixture of classic and contemporary tales from Mexico, China, Poland, Nigeria, and other lands near and far is perfect for hair-raising reading!

Initial Thoughts

Our next round of stories mostly take place in Britain and Ireland, with one in the West Indies and the last in the U.S.A. by Washington Irving. Not much to say except there’s more awesome art by Jacqueline Roberts, we get yet another strange variant of vampire, and *loudest sigh* one character is described as a beauty with “ebony skin” so there’s that.

As a reminder, everyone, I am still taking recap slots in exchange for a donation of $25 or more to any program, fund, or campaign helping with Black Lives Matter, the Yemen crisis, the Anti-Terror Bill in the Philippines, or the struggles of the indigenous American nations such as the Navajo and Hopi. You can find my info here as well as a list of books I currently own that haven’t been recapped yet.

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Posted in Movie Recaps

Recap #271: The Lost Boys (1987)

The Lost Boys (1987)

Title: The Lost Boys (1987)

Tagline: [bat: Shall we recite it in unison?] Sleep all day. Party all night. Never grow old. Never die. It’s fun to be a vampire.

[Dove: That is a long fucking tagline.]

Summary: A mother and her two teenage sons move to a seemingly nice and quiet small coastal California town yet soon find out that it’s overrun by bike gangs and vampires. A couple of teenage friends take it upon themselves to hunt down the vampires that they suspect of a few mysterious murders and restore peace and calm to their town. [Wing: That is a pretty bland summary. I guess I’ve never read it before. Also, if the bike gangs are as dangerous as the vampires, as implied with that juxtaposition, who is taking care of the bike gangs?

Also, two warnings: One, we’re all wordy and this is one of our favourite movies, so this is long. Two, if you’ve ever wanted to know more about the recappers, our histories, and our fannish experiences, you’re in luck, because the initial thoughts below the cut map us out.]

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #267: Goosebumps Series 2000 #19: Return to Ghost Camp by R.L. Stine

Return to Ghost Camp Cover by Tim Jacobus
Return to Ghost Camp Cover by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps Series 2000 #19 – Return to Ghost Camp, a.k.a. “Everybody Loves Ari”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: Another summer. Another spirit.

Summary: A big yellow bus roared to a stop in front of our house.

The bus doors opened.

“Going to Camp Full Moon?” the driver snarled.

I raised my eyes to his face – and screamed.

His face was red and swollen – and covered with fleas. Angry, dark blotches swelled on his forehead – raw, fresh flea bites, dripping with yellow gunk.

Initial Thoughts

Okay so I busted my ass to get this recap done in time for the first full moon of summer, but I regret I didn’t start sooner.

“Return to Ghost Camp” is the second sequel from the Goosebumps Series 2000 books, but unlike “Return to HorrorLand” this is NOT a direct sequel. We’re not returning to Camp Spirit Moon and we don’t find out what’s been happening in the lives of Harry and Alex Altman since “Ghost Camp.” And the protagonist in question, Dustin, is kinda a step down from the chemistry Harry and Alex had. I know, I know, I was disappointed too when I found out after first reading this book. I purchased it knowing nothing about the plot beyond the title.

However, while “Return to Ghost Camp” isn’t as great as its predecessor, it has its own merits. Our big villain is almost as mysterious as the previous antagonists and there’s a lot to interpret from its ending. And I must say Jacobus’ cover is probably one of the best he’s done for the 2000 books, eschewing the delightful humor of the original “Ghost Camp” to give us a rather creepy looking ghost.

[Wing: Camp Full Moon. That cover ghost looks like a partially-transformed werewolf ghost. WELL I HAVE HOPE.]

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #266: Goosebumps #4: Say Cheese And Die! by R.L. Stine

Say Cheese And Die Cover Artwork by Tim Jacobus
Say Cheese And Die Cover Artwork by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps #4 – Say Cheese And Die!, a.k.a. “Greg Banks Won’t Eat His Cereal”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: One picture is worth a thousand screams.

Summary: Every Picture Tells A Story.

Greg thinks there is something wrong with the old camera he and his friends found. The photographs keep turning out wrong. Very wrong. Like the snapshot Greg took of his father’s new car that shows it totaled. And then Greg’s father is in a nasty wreck.

But Greg’s friends don’t believe him. Shari even makes Greg bring the camera to her birthday party and take her picture.

Only Shari’s not in the photograph when it develops.

Is Shari about to be taken out of the picture permanently?

Who is going to take the next fall for…

the evil camera?

Initial Thoughts

It’s time again for another of my childhood faves, and it’s one of the first Goosebumps books I ever bought with my own money.

“Say Cheese And Die!” is one of the original ten, and it’s one of the most well remembered due to Tim Jacobus’ striking cover artwork. I used to own a t-shirt with that image when I was a kid. Apparently, R.L. Stine had to go back and include a sequence in this book based on the cover after it was finished.

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #254: Goosebumps Glow & Tell Story Cards by R.L. Stine and YOU

Goosebumps Glow And Tell Ad
Goosebumps Glow And Tell Ad

Title: Goosebumps Glow & Tell Story Cards, a.k.a. “‘BUMPS IN DA HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: N/A

Tagline: Get Goosebumps At Pizza Hut

Summary: Collect All Three Sets!

Keep your friends spellbound! Read them the terrifying tales on every creepy card – even make up your own endings! Project scary shapes on any dark wall! Then play the Goosebumps Bone Yard Board Game!

One available every other week with the purchase of a kids’ Pack! Includes personal pan pizza and 16oz soft drink. Get your Glow & Tell cards while supplies last between April 28 and June 22.

Initial Thoughts

SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY WING! I found this (near) complete set of Goosebumps memorabilia on eBay and thought it’d make an excellent gift recap for the site for Wing’s January birthday.

(Wing, there are mentions of spiders.)

I completely forgot about this but back in the 1990s, when Pizza Hut apparently still did those “Pizza Head Show” commercials (which I also forgot about) and gave away stuff like McDonald’s and Burger King, they partnered with Scholastic to do shit with Goosebumps. Actually they also partnered with Taco Bell, of all places, which are the giveaways I really remember. I think I did own the Goosebumps cup from Pizza Hut.

Goosebumps Pizza Hut Card Set
Goosebumps Pizza Hut Card Set

Wait does Burger King still do toys? Anyway, the Glow & Tell collection includes twelve bones with a short story printed on them and holes you can illuminate to cast scary shapes on the walls.

Goosebumps Story Cards
Goosebumps Story Cards

The stories are about Curly the Skeleton, the Abominable Snowman of Pasadena, and the Scarecrow from “The Scarecrow Walks At Midnight.” The stories are structured so you can come up with the endings.

Goosebumps Character Cards
Goosebumps Character Cards

I’m gonna structure this recap by quoting each of the twelve stories and providing my own ending plus space for Wing to provide her own endings too if they want.

The pieces are also designed to function as a make-shift board game, the “Goosebumps Bone Yard Board Game.”

[Wing: This is an adorable campaign. I’m delighted by it.]

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #253: Goosebumps Series 2000 #20: Be Afraid – Be Very Afraid! by R.L. Stine

Be Afraid Be Very Afraid Cover by Tim Jacobus
Be Afraid Be Very Afraid Cover by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps Series 2000 #20 – Be Afraid – Be Very Afraid! a.k.a. “YOU FINISH THE RECAP”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: There’s a new beast on the block…

Summary: The dragon’s wings stretched… stretched like a ship’s sail unfurling… and cut through power lines over the side of the street. Electricity crackled and sparks flew as the lines came down.

I watched, frozen in terror, as the dragon turned its massive body toward my house. It pulled back its head in an angry roar of attack.

“It’s – it’s coming here!” I choked out. “It’s coming after us!”

Initial Thoughts

It’s the beginning of the year and it’s wintertime, which means I’m stepping into the role of recapping another Goosebumps 2000 book thanks to my zeal for seasonal nostalgia.

This is one of the 2000 entries that’s been especially prominent in my thoughts since “Return to Ghost Camp” had a preview for it at its end. The title and summary don’t allude much to the actual plot besides the prominence of dragons, so I’ll explain it’s about a card game that seemingly comes to life as three kids play it. However, the story bizarrely gets rather… meta, near the end, and I can’t tell if Stine is mocking his own writing style or what.

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #252: Choose Your Own Nightmare #1: Night of the Werewolf by Edward Packard

Night of the Werewolf Cover by Bill Schmidt
Night of the Werewolf Cover by Bill Schmidt

Title: Choose Your Own Nightmare #1 – Night of the Werewolf, a.k.a. “The Wacky Witchy Werewolf War”

Author: Edward Packard

Illustrator: Bill Schmidt

Tagline: It’s a full moon… beware of howling beasts!

Summary: Who’s Afraid Of The Big Bad Wolf?

Your vacation at your cousins’ house is off to a creepy start. A body – with deep bite marks all over it – has just been found at the local pond.

Is there a werewolf in town?

Even though you’ve been warned to stay away, you and your cousins want to check out the crime scene. Things seem pretty normal. Until you hear branches crashing… and a throaty howl…

What happens next in this bone-chilling story? It all depends on the choices you make. How will your nightmare end? Only you can find out! And the best part is that you can keep reading and rereading, getting new chills and thrills – until not one but all of your worst nightmares have come true!

Give yourself goosebumps… choose your own NIGHTMARE…

Initial Thoughts

It’s the first month of the first year of a new decade, and we’re now forced to admit the 1990s were officially thirty years ago. And I’ll be turning 30 next December…

I’M OLLLLLLLLLLLLLLD!!!!

[Wing: *raises eyebrow* You are the youngest of the regular recappers across Devil’s Elbow and Sweet Valley Online, and possibly all of the Nostalgic Bookshelf collection. Best watch where you step, youngin’.]

To start off the 2020s here at Point Horror, for this first year I want to make it a year of firsts. Each month will feature at least one #1 book from a 90s horror series. I’ll be making an attempt to look at the firsts of series I’ve already offered glimpses into, such as Bone Chillers and Ghosts of Fear Street, and touch on series I’ve never looked at on here such as Choose Your Own Nightmare, Doomsday Mall, P.C. Hawke, and Christopher Pike’s Spooksville. You guys’ll be lucky, because a few of these books I’ve never read until now so it’ll be a learning experience for everyone.

[Wing: I love this book, I love werewolves, I love January’s full moon (it’s my favourite full moon), and I love recapping, and January is my birthday month, so this is a wonderful combination of things. Roll on Wolf Moon.]

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #250: Nocturnal Letters by Ms-Bowser

Nocturnal Letters
Nocturnal Letters

Title: Nocturnal Letters, a.k.a. “Night of the Nasty Notes”

Developer/Author: Ms-Bowser

Summary:

A scary/creepy point-and-click adventure game. Very plot-driven. You can almost call it an interactive movie.

Ivy lives with her family in a big house in the forest. Things have been rather strange lately. Help Ivy find out what is wrong, and uncover the awful secret.

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #249: Goosebumps #53: Chicken Chicken by R.L. Stine

Goosebumps: Chicken Chicken Cover by Tim Jacobus
Goosebumps: Chicken Chicken Cover by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps #53 – Chicken Chicken, a.k.a. “The Clucking”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: It’s a finger lickin’ nightmare!

Summary: Don’t Call Them Chicken Legs!

Everyone in Goshen Falls knows about weird Vanessa. She dresses all in black. Wears black lipstick. And puts spells on people. At least, that’s what they say.

Crystal and her brother, Cole, know you can’t believe everything you hear. But that was before they made Vanessa mad. Before she whispered that strange warning, “Chicken Chicken.”

Because now something really weird has happened. Crystal’s lips have turned as hard as a bird’s beak. And Cole has started growing ugly white feathers all over his body…

Initial Thoughts

“Chicken Chicken” is notorious among fans as the absolute worst of the original 62 books, even more so than the “Monster Blood” books. Reading the book as a kid it wasn’t something I picked up on, given I probably sped through it and put it back with my other books. Re-reading it now I can see why this book is so reviled, though I personally think the worst book out of the entire franchise is “Revenge R Us.”

The problem with “Chicken Chicken” is its villain goes completely overboard in her punishment on the main characters  to the point there’s nothing funny or endearing about it. She’s so borderline sadistic it just makes her awful, and it’s especially hard to stomach the treatment main character Crystal gets. What compounds this is Crystal doesn’t do anything wrong.

But don’t take it from me, here’s what Crystal has to say:

I don't clucking believe this
Crystal by Felipe Smith – Considering she’s apparently turning into a rooster, which are biologically male, she’s got every right to be scared.

[Wing: Okay, that’s adorable, but wow, the premise of this book sounds terrible. I did not read it growing up, but I can see why readers at the time hated it. I doubt it is any worse than the Slappy books, personally, but this is pretty weird.]

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #247: Tales For The Midnight Hour by J.B. Stamper Part Two

Tales for the Midnight Hour Original Cover
Tales for the Midnight Hour Original Cover

Title: Tales For The Midnight Hour

Author: Judith Bauer “J.B.” Stamper

Cover Artist: ???

Summary: N/A

Initial Thoughts

My original plan to cover the second half of this book was to have the recap finished during the summer, preferably August to go alongside “Escape from Vampire Park,” and yet again I was delayed. I’m trying to use November as a catch-up month to finish a few things before December so I can focus on more holiday related recaps.

Looking back I have to say I’m more fond of the stories in the book’s first half, and the only story in this section I favor is “Phobia.” Amusingly, the last tale sets up an ongoing theme Stamper reused for the next three collections featuring the same cast of campers even though the stories aren’t connected by anything else. [Wing: Okay, using the same cast is interesting. I look forward to seeing those stories if we can track down copies.]

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #244: Goosebumps Series 2000 #10: Headless Halloween by R.L. Stine

Goosebumps Series 2000: Headless Halloween Cover Art by Tim Jacobus
Goosebumps Series 2000: Headless Halloween Cover Art by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps Series 2000 #10 – Headless Halloween, a.k.a. “Brandon Did A Bad, Bad Thing”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: Talk about getting ahead!

Summary: Frozen in silence, I squinted into the eerie, pale light. Hands popped up from beneath the ground. They shook off dirt and stretched. A dozen hands poked up, shimmering yellow and green in the moonlight.

And then heads. Human heads. Hair caked with dirt. Skin loose, hanging from their skulls. They stared at me with pleading eyes, faces twisted, mouths hanging open in pain.

“Take me with you,” one of them called in a dry whisper.

Initial Thoughts

Wow it took me like two years to finally finish this recap I suck.

I started this some time in December 2017 before I figured out a routine for my Goosebumps recaps. I was still excited about recapping for Devil’s Elbow and this was one of the books I wanted to cover first as it’s one of my favorites. Admittedly it’s one of my favorites because that has to be one of the best covers Jacobus ever did for the franchise and I’m a sucker for Halloween stories.

So, you know how Stine has this uncanny ability to create protagonists who turn out to be exceedingly selfish and petty and they’re supposed to be the GOOD guys? Yeah, now imagine what happens when Stine creates a character who’s horrible on PURPOSE and you get our protagonist Brandon. However, because Brandon’s a dipshit it means the book is about him getting put through the wringer for being an unholy little fucker.

Stine also crafts a very suitable environment for Halloween and has one of my favorite settings in the entirety of the Goosebumps 2000 books.

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #242: Halloween Extravaganza – Fillmore!: Episode #21, “The Unseen Reflection”

Fillmore Title Card
Fillmore Title Card

Title: Fillmore! – The Unseen Reflection

Director: Christian Roman

Writer: Madellaine Paxson

Summary: Vampirita, a series of novels about an astronaut vampire, has attracted a huge following at X – and none more so that Torrey and Terri. The next installment of the series will be released in a fortnight, and until then, fans can audition to star in the next book! Terri and Torrey start to build projects to win the auditions, but every time one is finished, it gets sabotaged. Naturally, the main suspects are two members of a rival novel’s fanclub – TQ, a mysterious and riddle-talking guy with an affinity for multicultural cuisine, and Trace, a girl who never seems to be happy with the color of her hair. But evidence points to neither… so just who could have enough knowledge about the projects to find the perfect way to sabotage them?

Initial Thoughts

Now it’s time for a very special recap on Devil’s Elbow, featuring that cult classic Disney show “Fillmore!”

Airing in the early 2000s, “Fillmore!” was an animated series done in the style of 1970s crime and detective shows set within a middle school. Specifically it was set within X Middle School, one of the biggest middle schools in America. That’s not even hyperbole because X Middle School is fucking HUGE. It’s practically a city. To put this in perspective, they have clubs for everything including a field for bocce ball, a corn maze so large they had to send a rescue team to save some poor kid who came out screaming “IT ALL LOOKS THE SAME!!!!”, an expo center for science fairs, and a fucking JAI ALAI STADIUM. An entire stadium SOLELY for jai alai.

The main characters are Cornelius C. Fillmore (Orlando Brown) and Ingrid Third (Tara Strong). Fillmore was once the worst juvenile delinquent to ever attend X Middle School until he turned over a new leaf and joined the Safety Patrol. Ingrid, a goth girl with a photographic memory making her the smartest kid in school, was another former delinquent who transferred to X from a school in Nepal following a prank with a stink bomb and a pinata.

As partners in the Safety Patrol, Fillmore and Ingrid have gone around solving a number of bizarre crimes, including:

  • The destruction of an entire model train expo
  • The kidnapping of X Middle School’s beloved mascot, Lobsty the Lobster, during Spirit Week
  • A serial shredder going around destroying school projects with a handheld paper shredder
  • The tagging of a graffiti artist going by the handle “Stainless,” whose antics lead Fillmore and Ingrid to seek the aid of another tagger put in permanent detention ala Hannibal Lector for something unspeakable he drew with only a mini golf pencil
  • The theft of EVERY SINGLE BOOK in the school’s massive library
  • A group of students forming a vigilante squad to get revenge on the school’s bullies by traumatizing them for life
  • A counterfeit baseball card ring organized by a visiting Canadian diplomat’s son who has “Diplomatic immunity” and thus can’t be touched by the Safety Patrol
  • Threats made against the school’s star chess player, Checkmatey, who’s inexplicably a white gangsta kid who churns out cringeworthy raps

Every single crime in the series is treated with the same amount of ridiculous seriousness, the exact way shows like “Starsky & Hutch,” would handle them. It’s got chase sequences up the ying-yang, interrogations, and Fillmore and Ingrid getting chewed out by their superior officer, Chief Vallejo.

So yeah, the “X” probably stands for “Xtra” because everyone in this show is operating at 75 out of 10. The best is probably the school’s principal, Dawn S. Folsom, voiced by Wendie Malick giving a delightfully hammy performance. She spends most of her time either sweetly complimenting the Safety Patrol when she’s not threatening to have them all shipped to Kazakhstan, or she’ll turn their HQ into her own personal sauna. She’s such an egotist the school’s drama club did a musical about her life story. My favorite scene involves her ranting about making sure Checkmatey brings glory to the school while she’s vocally changing the settings on her massage chair.

“And then the void in our trophy case, and the VOID in my HEART, WILL BE FILLED! DEEP TISSUE!!!

Unfortunately, she’s not in this episode.

No I picked this episode to review on Devil’s Elbow because the conflict involves sabotage being inflicted against members of a fan club for a book series about a vampire astronaut. The main suspects are members of a rival fan club for a different franchise. The episode offers a look into fandom wars, toxic fandoms, and what happens when creators stop giving a shit. [Wing: Well this should be interesting.]

As luck would have it, back when the show was still on Toon Disney (or Disney XD, at the time) they once did a marathon of all the episodes that hadn’t yet aired on this channel. I recorded all of them on a video tape I still own and still works. This episode’s the last one on the tape, so I’ve known about it for years.

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Posted in Snark at the Moon! recaps

Recap #241: Skinwalkers (2006)

Skinwalkers coverTitle: Skinwalkers (2006)

Summary: A 12 year old boy and his mother become the targets of two warring werewolf packs, each with different intentions and motives. [Wing: Man, that is a boring summary, if truthful.] [bat: It’s pretty… lame.]

Tagline: For them to live, we must die. OR They hunt us. [Wing: The first one is better. Sort of. It’s still a lie, though. They don’t have to kill us, they simply choose to. Some of them, at least.]

Initial Thoughts

I’ve watched this before, but not for many years, and I’ve forgotten pretty much everything that happens during it. I don’t even remember all the characters, so this will almost be a brand-new experience for me.

[bat: I’ve never seen this. I vaguely remember it being released; I have a weird penchant for knowing all kinds of things about films but never actually seeing them. But I don’t know if it was because I think of “skinwalkers” as being something different in the supernatural sense from werewolves, if that was the reason I passed on it, or if it was because it just didn’t sound good. Oh well, watching it now!]

And of course, this is my favourite time of year. Roll on Snark at the Moon 2019 and welcome to the Hunters’ Moon!

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Posted in Goosebumps Recaps

Recap #239: Goosebumps #16: One Day at HorrorLand by R.L. Stine

One Day at HorrorLand Cover by Tim Jacobus
One Day at HorrorLand Cover by Tim Jacobus

Title: Goosebumps #16 – “One Day at HorrorLand,” a.k.a “TW: Pinching”

Author: R.L. Stine

Cover Artist: Tim Jacobus

Tagline: Enter, if you dare…

Summary: The Next Ride Might Be Their Last…

Lizzy’s family got lost trying to find Zoo Gardens Theme Park. But that’s okay. They found another theme park instead.

In HorrorLand there are no crowds. No lines. And the admission is free. It seems like a pretty cool place.

But there was before Lizzy’s heart-stopping ride on the deadly Doom Slide. And that terrifying experience in the House of Mirrors.

Because there’s something weird about the rides in HorrorLand.

Something a little too creepy.

A little too real…

Initial Thoughts

I started the draft for this recap TWO YEARS AGO when I first began writing for Point Horror. I never finished it because there never seemed to be an appropriate time for it, until now with the amusement park and vampire theme I tried to set up for August.

Wing because I know you better now I have to warn you there’s mention of spiders near the end of the book.

This has been one of my favorite books in the original series for as long as I can remember, because I love the concept of HorrorLand. I love it when Stine tries to establish there’s an entire world in his books even though it’s unlikely they’ll be visited again, because it leaves me wanting more. Surprisingly, this book has received a lot of attention over the years. It got a sequel in the 2000 series, a two-episode TV adaption, a board game, a computer game sequel, a graphic novel adaption by JILL FREAKING THOMPSON, a video game adaptation for the PS2 and the Nintendo Wii, AND an entire spin-off series (which was admittedly lackluster). [Wing: Well damn, that’s a lot! I don’t think I’ve read/seen/played this one before, so this should be fun.]

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Posted in Graveyard School recaps

Recap #237: Graveyard School Final 3 Countdown: #25 – Escape from Vampire Park by Tom B. Stone

Graveyard School #25: Escape from Vampire Park Cover by Mark Nagata
Graveyard School #25: Escape from Vampire Park Cover by Mark Nagata

Title: Graveyard School #25 – Escape from Vampire Park, a.k.a. “#judedelucalovesjordieflandersSHUTUP”

Author: Tom B. Stone, a.k.a. Nola Thacker, a.k.a. D.E. Athkins

Cover Artist: Mark Nagata

Summary: Take A Ride In The Tunnel Of Blood…

Cover your eyes. Scream your brains out. It’s the scariest ride in the whole amusement park. But brave Nathan isn’t afraid. He knows the ride is one big fake. Except now he’s about to find out how the Tunnel of Blood got its name. He’s about to stop laughing and start screaming. Too late, Nate.

The worst ride of your life has just begun.

Initial Thoughts

We’re down to three and the last summer book before we return to the hallowed halls of Graveyard School. But returning after such a long absence is none other than my favorite, Jordie “The Human Computer” Flanders.

Interestingly, as you could tell from the summary Jordie is not the main character. That role’s taken by newbie Nathan, who had never been mentioned as a member of the sixth grade class until now. Yet Jordie is still the one who does most of the investigating into the creepy things at Vampire Park, and Nathan’s targeted mainly because people think he and Jordie are friends. It works in a way because, since Jordie’s the co-protagonist, we get to see someone else react to her Jordie-isms.

Along the way, we also realize (for those of us who know what happened in “Camp Dracula“) that Jeep Holmes and his family are apparently REALLY bad at their jobs.

So join me as we say goodbye to Jordie.

[Wing: I’m not ready for this series to end. I’m not, I’m not, I’m not. But I am excited to see Jordie again.]

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Posted in Other Recaps

Recap #236: The Last Vampire #8 | Thirst #4: The Shadow of Death by Christopher Pike (Part Three)

Cover of The Last Vampire #8 | Thirst #4 Shadow of Death by Christopher Pike
The Last Vampire #8 | Thirst #4 Shadow of Death by Christopher Pike

Title: The Last Vampire #8 | Thirst #4: The Shadow of Death

Summary: I have returned to life, but it’s to a suddenly lonely world.

Alisa is a five-thousand-year-old vampire, stronger and more cunning than her adversaries. But now she’s trapped in the body of a newborn vampire and at the mercy of a terrible thirst. Worst of all, she’s facing enemies whose fierce desire for domination grows ever stronger. The immortal race the Telar is threatening to release a virus to decimate humanity. But Alisa and her friends can’t take down the Telar on their own, and they must turn to the mysterious organisation the IIC for help. But the IIC has secrets of its own and may have ulterior motives. With two rivals and no one to trust, Alisa must rely on her dark side to defeat them. But it could cost her life, or her soul… [Wing: How many goddamn times is she going to die?]

Tagline: Tortured Soul. Final Judgment. [Wing: Yeah, right. I’ll believe this is the end when I see it.]

Initial Thoughts

Previously on Sita-has-a-new-body-and-the-world-may-end-soon-whoops: Sita was in Teri’s body. Sita’s back in Sita’s body. Teri’s body is dead. The Telar want to use a virus to end the world. The IIC wants to use their Array to at least control the world and possibly end it. Sita’s off to IIC to try to blackmail and bribe them into being used to take out the Telar. Good times, good times.

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